Poor and poorly supported parents
“It hurts, I told her no, but she does it anyway.” In October 2023, Heloise1in a small nursery section in a school in the Paris region, complains of pain in the “zezette” area, for the second time in a week. She points to Lauriane, a little girl in her class: “She gets on my nerves, at school and at the theater. She put her hand in her panties several times.” His mother, Clemency2remembers that a few days before, her daughter had covered her vulva with her hand, when she had undressed her to put her in pajamas. A gesture that caught her attention.
On the day of these revelations, Clémence tries to show Héloïse how to remove Lauriane’s hand, if by chance she does it again. But her daughter’s reaction increases her concern: “I put my hand on her lower stomach and, at that moment, she became petrified, frozen in place, afraid. She had never had this reaction. She’s a lively little girl, very spontaneous, who talks a lot and is very happy.” Especially since the little girl mentions other facts which stress Clémence even more, which I will not report here in order to respect her request.
“I felt stigmatized. I felt like I was in front of judges and that everything was my fault, even though I was in distress.”
The very day of this discovery, when taking her daughter to school, Clémence confided in her daughter’s teacher who, according to her, had a listening attitude. The latter explains to him that she saw the two children put their hands in their own pants, but cannot provide any further help. “She asked around, but she didn’t know anything about it,” she told me. At that moment, I thought that my daughter needed to see a psychologist who had the ability to question her.relates Clémence.
So begins, for this mother, a series of searches to find a psychologist or professional capable of assessing whether her daughter has suffered any trauma. Research that for the mother is akin to the quest for a hidden treasure: “No psychologist wants to see my daughter. I try to call several of them, but they all tell me that they are not specialists and that it is by filing a complaint that I will have access to someone. A doctor is consulted, who does not provide any insight. Then another who advises going to the emergency room. The mother complies and follows all the advice given to her. Once at the hospital, she was encouraged to file a complaint, which she did the same day. With her complaint, she obtains an appointment with a forensic doctor who does not draw up a report, but reassures her orally, she explains to me, by telling her that no penetration was made on her daughter.
Clémence then thinks it appropriate to notify the school of her complaint, telling herself that police investigators are likely to visit the site and that it is better to notify the establishment in advance. The institution’s reaction was rapid: a meeting was organized a few days later by the director. Present at this meeting are the director of the daycare center, the teacher and a head of National Education, whose position Clémence cannot identify. A system has been put in place to limit risky interactions between the two children, by preventing them from passing each other in the toilet and by guaranteeing that the little ones are accompanied by the older ones.
This answer might seem satisfactory, but Clémence does not get the support she wants during this meeting. “I felt stigmatized. I felt like I was in front of judges and that everything was my fault, even though I was in distress.”
Worse, the institution later carried out a form of retaliation, by canceling a project that it had started the previous year and which had nevertheless obtained oral agreement, according to the mother. “The teacher told me that the principal no longer wants it, even though it was something I had done last year, and that she agreed in principle.” In December, the other little girl changed schools, but Clémence felt absolutely alone during the entire episode. “Only the policewoman and the forensic doctor gave me help”she regrets.
(…)
In almost half of the cases dismissed, the people who filed a complaint are simply not informed of the outcome of their proceedings.
When justice leaves us in the dark
As I write these lines, Clémence, Héloïse’s mother, has filed a complaint for more than a year. She has no news of his file. She is in the dark, says she is worried, not knowing if the investigation can resume one day, and if the police can come and knock on her door and reawaken the trauma. This silence is the common lot of several families of victims that we interviewed.
This situation is not rare, according to inspectors from the Ministries of Justice, Administration and General and Social Affairs, who affirm that, in 41% of procedures that they analyzed3there is no trace of the notification of the notice of classification without action, although provided for by the Penal Code. In other words, in almost half of the cases dismissed – which is the outcome when young children are involved – the people who filed a complaint are simply not informed of the outcome of their procedure. And they don’t have any more information during the procedure. “Communication is not happening”laments Anne Parachout (psychologist from the family protection brigade (BPF), who works with minor victims and perpetrators of sexual violence, at the Boulogne-Billancourt police station).
When a notice of dismissal finally arrives in the mailbox, the accompanying explanations are meager, if not non-existent. When the perpetrator is under 13 years of age, most often the only thing that appears on paper is the idea that he or she is not likely to be prosecuted. With sometimes, as a bonus, a few snippets of explanations on the fact that his “lack of capacity for discernment” has been confirmed by law and he or she is not “criminally responsible” of his actions.
It can also be written that the case is closed without further action for “insufficient evidence”, as in the Pantin affair4even if, in reality, the procedure would not have been successful due to age. In another classification notice, there is simply… nothing written, blank lines following the introductory sentence: “Consideration of these criminal proceedings does not justify criminal prosecution on the grounds that: XXXX.”
